How ADHD can affect self-esteem and promote self-worth

Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) is a mental health condition that can affect the structure of certain parts of your brain, making it difficult to focus or control your emotions.

Many people misunderstand this state of mental health, assuming that it is a disorder of character rather than a neurological disorder.

If you live with ADHD, you may have some knowledge of it yourself. People can be:

Blaming you for your symptoms

Says you need to try harder.

Suggest that you can only bootstrap yourself for the "minor" by willpower.

Of course, this is not true. Your symptoms are not your fault. And just as you did not choose ADHD, you cannot eliminate these symptoms.

It may go without saying, but constant criticism, accusation, and shame will not cure ADHD. However, they can also cause low self-esteem.

May cause low self-esteem:

Difficulty in pursuing goals or trying new things, often due to the assumption of failure

Loneliness, often due to fear of rejection or criticism from others

Difficulty saying or not enforcing other limits, often due to desire to get approval from others

Of course, boosting self-esteem can improve quality of life. But in a society full of ugly stains, it is often easier to say.

Read on to learn how to help yourself or a loved one with ADHD and cultivate a strong sense of self-worth and self-esteem.

Research consistently suggests that people with ADHD have lower self-esteem than their neurotic peers.

Some possible reasons include:

Stigma

People do not always recognize ADHD as a serious condition.

Like other mental health conditions and chronic illnesses that do not have obvious physical symptoms, ADHD can cause a great deal of social stigma. Some people may reject your needs or be annoyed and angry at being asked to adjust your condition.

Evidence suggests that people with ADHD may experience lifelong discrimination:

Children with ADHD symptoms are more likely to be criticized or treated coldly by their parents.

Children with ADHD behaviors are more likely to intimidate classmates.

College students are less prepared to interact with young adults with ADHD.

Repeated rejections can ultimately lower your self-esteem. Alternatively, if other people continue to treat you badly, you may begin to realize that you deserve it.

Lack of housing

People with ADHD do not always get the housing they need to succeed in school and work. These shocks often affect one stage of life.

Difficulties in organization and time management can affect your performance, and as a result low grade and poor reviews can hide your natural abilities.

Furthermore, lower grades in school may limit your choice of college or job. With fewer opportunities, you are less likely to find an environment that suits your thinking.

If you have never had the opportunity to show off your potential and show off your talents, you may have a shaky idea about your talents. As a result, you can minimize yourself.

Criticism

In the 2022 survey, 162 people with ADHD were critically asked about their experiences. Participants said that they are often criticized for their attitudes towards attention, forgetfulness, organization and time management - the symptoms are largely out of their control.

When you have ADHD, your brain processes time differently. This can make it extremely difficult to stick to a schedule or plan things out. You don't forget things on purpose. You forget things because of the difference in how your brain works. This is partly because ADHD is often labeled a disability.

When people criticize you for having ADHD symptoms, it may feel like they are attacking you directly. And you are more likely to absorb personal criticisms into your psyche, where they can damage your self-esteem.

Sensitivity to rejection

People with ADHD are particularly susceptible to rejection, although experts have not yet determined whether this sensitivity is related to ADHD itself or is due to the fact that people with ADHD face severe criticism. ۔

Whatever the reason, the rejection sensitivity may make it more likely that you will view neutral comments as critical and react strongly to them.

Some people with ADHD also experience rejection sensitive dysphoria (RSD). When you have RSD, even mildly negative comments can provoke panic, anger or guilt. You may shake yourself for what you perceive to be a mistake, or you may feel disgusted with the thought of disappointing others.

Given all of these potential challenges, you might want to consider how to deal with feelings of insecurity and self-doubt.

These tips offer a place to start.

How can adults with ADHD boost their self-esteem?

One of the strategies to increase your self-confidence involves focusing on your inner strengths.

A 2016 study examined what factors support self-esteem in adults with ADHD. The authors list the following personal traits (from the strongest to the weakest):

A sense of control, or a feeling that can affect the long-term direction of your life.

Confidence, or trust that your own skills can help you in the short term.

Courage, or the ability to face the unknown and what you think is right.

Comfort, or willingness to accept things you can't change and hope for the future.

Creativity, or the ability to combine ideas and look at things from different angles

Ability to love, or to express warm feelings and accept love from others

Another way to boost your self-esteem is to look for people who:

Accept you as you are.

Understand what you are going through.

Don't try to change or "fix" you.

These may include family, friends, or members of the ADHD support group.

remember

A strong social network, consisting of people who take the time to get to know you, can present itself as a clear mirror against the thugs and bigots of the world who look down on you or criticize you. Do

How can parents boost their child's self-confidence?

If your child has ADHD, keep in mind that your behavior can have a profound effect on their self-esteem.

These tips can help you emotionally support your child:

Acknowledge their strengths.

Everyone has things that they do particularly well. Your child may be a budding musician or have a strong sense of humor. Kids don't always recognize their gifts, so tell me if you see any skills. You can affect lifelong interest.

Set them up to succeed.

If you want your child to do something, give him tools to do it well. For example, if they have a piece of paper owed, you can help them sketch out their points of view so that the work feels less heavy.

Even small accomplishments can give your child confidence.

Measure growth, not rank.

Avoid comparing your child to neurotic classmates or siblings. This unfair comparison can be deeply discouraging.

Instead, appreciate their efforts when you see improvement in certain skills or behaviors. Celebrating their progress can motivate them to work harder.

Maintain discipline for the things your child deliberately does.

If your child forgets to throw it in the trash after dinner, scolding him for his absence will do nothing but embarrass him. Instead, try a gentle reminder.

On the other hand, if they lie and say that they took out the trash when there is a bad smell in the kitchen, then this behavior can guarantee reprimand or any other consequence - to lie, not to forget. of the.

Show them love

Children with ADHD have difficulty making friends or getting fit at school. While you can't always save your child from being rejected, you can offer unconditional love at home.

Even having a supportive relationship can go a long way in boosting their self-esteem - and perhaps boosting their confidence in finding other positive relationships.

People with ADHD are generally more likely to have low self-esteem, but being undiagnosed with ADHD can make you even weaker.

In a 2020 study, adults diagnosed with ADHD were compared to adults who reported symptoms of ADHD but had no diagnosis. Undiagnosed participants averaged 3 points lower than their peers on the Rosenberg Self-Esteem Scale (a total of 30 points on this scale).

Why do adults without a diagnosis of ADHD have lower self-esteem than those diagnosed?

Well, imagine you haven't treated ADHD symptoms all your life, never knowing why:

Your dirty laundry always looks spread out on the floor.

You can't force yourself to write that paper until the last second

Looks like you don't make it anywhere on time, no matter how hard you try.

Without explanation, you can assume that you are a naturally dirty or "lazy" person.

But knowing that your mental health condition is untreated can make it easier to avoid blaming and criticizing yourself, not to mention seeking the right kind of help.

Treatment for ADHD often involves a combination of medication and therapy.

While no pill can magically boost self-esteem, therapy alone does not help improve ADHD symptoms. It can also help promote a healthy relationship.

For adults

ADHD and low self-esteem together can create unique challenges and difficulties in everyday life.

It may be helpful to contact a physician if you:

Censor yourself in conversation for fear of offending others

Whenever you feel frustrated or guilty, keep yourself down

Often upset that people hate you or make you feel annoyed when they don't return text or match your enthusiasm in conversation

Has a history of bullying or abuse.

Feel deprived of the motivation to do basic self-care activities such as bathing and eating.

For children

According to a 2013 literary review, treatment for ADHD can help improve self-esteem for children and adolescents.

Helping your child or teen get in touch with a doctor can be a good next step if they often:

Put yourself down to make others laugh

Respond to compliments with suspicion or jealousy.

Refuse to try new things for fear of failure and embarrassment.

Whenever they are asked to do things that you find easy, such as cleaning their room.

Complain that they have been excluded from friend groups and do not understand the reason

If you have other mental health symptoms.

Therapy can also help if you or a loved one has symptoms of other mental health conditions.

According to a 2017 study, up to 80% of adults with ADHD have another mental health condition, including:

In medical samples, 65 to 85% of children with ADHD have at least one co-occurring condition.

Concerns about mental health can certainly affect self-esteem. But they can also make it difficult to recognize ADHD symptoms. This is one of the main reasons why reaching out for help can make such a difference.

A trained mental health professional can diagnose ADHD and any of its accompanying conditions, as well as help you find your treatment options.

Our guide can help you find the right doctor for you.

The stigma and misunderstandings around ADHD can easily affect your perception of yourself and help lower your self-esteem.

It may take some time to regain your sense of worth, especially if you have spent most of your life absorbing these messages. But social support, self-empathy, and the therapist's guidance can go a long way in helping you build self-confidence and self-esteem, just as you are.

Emily Sweem is a freelance health writer and editor who specializes in psychology. He has a BA in English from Canyon College and a written MFA from the California College of the Arts. In 2021, it received its Board of Editors in Life Sciences (BELS) certification. You can find more of it at GoodTherapy, Verywell, Investopedia, Vox, and Insider. Find it on Twitter and LinkedIn.